Dear Rumpy…

Dear Rumpy,

It’s hard to believe it ‘s been one month since you died.

IMG_8101
Rumpy’s resting place

I am still not used to waking and not having to immediately go outside, or not needing to hurry home so you can pee. I don’t spend much time outside in the yard anymore. Last week I mowed the yard and saw the wind had blown down a bunch of limbs. How many days had they been there?

I’m still not used to you not being there to share my dinner, or to clean up the floor when I spill things. I’ve actually had to throw cat food away. That never used to happen.

I look for you to be in the floor nearby. I still expect for you to greet me when I come home.

IMG_8120
Rumpy’s memory box. I have some of his fur and some other special things inside.

Things have gotten better. I’ve moved your collar and leash out of the living room, and I finally emptied the cookie jar.

But I find myself crying at the most unpredictable times. Like one morning as I was headed out the door to work and I automatically said good-bye to you, then stopped myself once I realized what I’d done. Or the time I burst into tears as I mowed the yard because I hadn’t been in that part of the yard since the last time I’d mowed, and I remembered it was because you aren’t here to check the perimeter.

Now June Buggie is also dying, and I feel spent. Grief can be so tiring, you know.

IMG_8155
Eripan sent this wonderful mug with Rumpy’s photo. I keep it on the counter so I can see his sweet face.

I am focusing on remembering your joyful spirit. I look at the memory box our friend Jayne sent me, and at the mug with your photo sent by Eripan, and I smile.

But at this moment, baby, I miss you more than you could ever know.

44 thoughts on “Dear Rumpy…

  1. My heart breaks for you. I have been where you’re at and I feel the same feelings. And I know how difficult it is when you turn around and talk to someone who’s not there. And I don’t know how long it takes to get over it or if it ever happens. And now you’re losing June buggy to – and that makes it worse. You need a Break and it doesn’t look like you’re going to get one soon. Holding you all in the light

  2. It’s so hard to go to bed without them and to wake up and to see there are not there…. hugs to you, that is such a darned sad time, I have no clue how I made it through….my tears are running for your cookie-saurus ….

  3. Dear Jen, I’m so sorry about your loss of Rumpy……today’s post made me cry, again……yes, whenever I look at his cute pictures on the website…..at first I smile and then I realise that he is not there any more, which makes me so sad….I still can’t believe that he is not there anymore….. I totally understand how much you miss him, Jen…….but I believe that Rumpy…his soul is still there…..some people might say that “That is not true….” but I’d love to think that he still protect you and your family even though his body doesn’t exsist anymore….I’m not religious person and I don’t belong to any religious but I just want to believe that if someone whom we really love has gone….he/she encourages us with the invisible….Rumpy will be in the yard whenever you are there and he sees you off when you go to work and say good- by to him in the air….he is there….not only Rumpy….but also DeDe, Sage, and Malachi are, too…..I’m sorry if my poor English won’t tell you what I want to say correctly…..Jen….I wish I could be there to give you a big hug……I don’t want to lose June Buggie…..I know that he is old but I hope he will be able to be there with you as long as he can…..I’m sending prayers and am always keeping him in my thoughts…….I love your family.

  4. i felt the same thing when my dog Johnnie died. I cry everyday. I watched how his fur in the garage and yard being blown by the wind until there’s none. I never really swept them as i know they are reminders of him. It took me a long time (almost a year) until i could finally carry the heartbreak without too much crying. I still miss him and sometimes cry as i think about him. Well, it is okay to cry… And about those fur in the garage and yard, now there’s a lot (again) because of Marwind (a GSD like Johnnie) whom i got after almost a year of mourning when Johnnie died.

  5. I am so very sorry. My kitties are sending purrs to comfort you in your loss. Our loss. ❤

  6. Such a terrible feeling of emptiness. I’m so sorry you’re struggling with your loss of Rumpy and with June Buggie’s illness. Sadly it’s the price we all pay for loving very truly and deeply.

    Thinking of you and wishing you some moments of joy to help you get through.

  7. I feel your pain and loneliness! Nothing I can say will take away your pain. There are times, when out of no where, you will remember your lost friend and the ache will hit you like a shot, and the tears will come, but that’s ok. Rumpy knows that he was loved and he is still there, even though you cannot see him. I know this!

  8. I know how you feel. Phoebe has been gone for over a year and I still cry every day for her. I forget as well that she’s not here and talk to her, then catch myself. We haven’t gone into the bar, her favorite place in the house, much since she died. It’s just too much for me. I am crying as I type this. I am sending you the biggest virtual hug I can.

  9. So sad. So, so sad. You are reminding me I’ve not left the house once calling out a goodbye to Jamima. I am more free about leaving the front door wide open because I know she isn’t going to attempt an escape for freedom. Every plate of pasta sauce or minestrone I soup sits neglected by her tongue. How she enjoyed the pre-wash routine to dishes. Not so cheery, H

  10. It’s the price of love, but your days of pain will pass long before you equal even half the days of love you shared.

    It’s so hard when losing another.

  11. As a pet owner and one who has lost a few of them too you have hit those feelings of lost right on the head of the nail with the old hammer but it isn’t even that has much as the love you have for your pet and those feelings your receive back are unconditional. I’m so very sorry for your loss I wish I could say more to ease the pain but I don’t know what it would be. Thank you for sharing and God bless. ❤

  12. I know how you feel. It’s how I felt after Cinnamon crossed the Rainbow Bridge 3 years ago, and I still miss her a lot. And my Shadow, though it’s been about 8 months since he joined Cinnamon at the Bridge, I still miss him, too.

  13. I wish I could offer more than (((hugs)))) this was just so beautiful. I am so sorry for all of the horrible pain you are having to endure, I am so deeply, deeply sorry.

  14. Hang in there Jen, it will get better with time and prayers. It’s been since October that Guinness passed and his memory box is right near where I usually sit. I still cry at times. I’m praying for you. God Bless.

  15. So very sorry for you. The grief of losing a sweet boy like Rumpy is an unimaginable burden. Know we in Blogville are walking with you, step by step and our hearts are aching for you especially given June Buggy’s state. Blessings.

  16. I am crying now….I can do that very easily…I understand completely…nothing wrong with tears…anybody who thinks tears do not matter is an absolute fool….thinking of you…and crying WITH you!

  17. I wish I could take your pain away for you,its so hard ,this made me think of Caramel and Thumper,we are all crying with you lovely,xx Rachel and Speedy

  18. I am so sorry for your pain and the fact that June Buggy is getting on as well. There is never any easy way to move forward. They all take a piece of us. Even with 7 animals currently sharing the zoo, the angles past visit my heart often. Our thoughts and prayers are with you – Lorian and the DogDaz Zoo, Louise, Sofie Bear, Charles, Noel, Nine, Stella, and Mini Cooper

  19. I wish there was something we could do to help you through your grief, Jen. Please just know we care, and that we are sending all good thoughts your way. ❤

  20. Grumpy was a grand fellow, I didn’t know him long but his sweet face is still able to generate a warm fuzzy feeling.

    Your heart is so bruised, but I still find myself announcing I am home to my Toes….7 yrs past. I choose to believe that is the rainbow bridge equivalent of brushing against my leg to greet me. ❤ to you & June Buggie

  21. I feel utterly crushed! I missed you losing Rumpy & again I am apologizing…
    I am so very sorry Jen. Rumpy was one sweet & loveable dog & I adored him. Now he is with Nylablue in spirit. It is hard to wrap my head around the fact Rumpy is gone; but he lives on thru you! ALWAYS! I love the mug (I have a mug with NB on it) & the ash box is lovely (I have NB & Mingflower’s ashes in their boxes here) & that memory box is lovely. We were blessed to have our 4 leggeds in our lives. That is why saying ‘Goodbye’ is such a wrench……
    May all your memories be a comfort to you.
    With love & respect, Sherri-Ellen 😦

Leave a Reply to Deborah Darsie Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s