I told you last April about Little Girl’s fearful behavior and Graybie’s aggressive behavior toward her.
Since taking her to the vet, I’ve tried Feliway diffusers and calming collars. I’ve bought interactive toys and engaged in play with the cats. I’ve given Little Girl time alone and fed her away from the others.
Things got a bit better, but they have since taken a turn for the worse. She is now peeing and pooping outside the litter box. Little Girl acts fearful of Graybie, and he, in return, acts aggressively toward her.
I took Little Girl back to the vet today, and we talked about next steps. I’m taking Graybie in Thursday for an exam. I’m moving the cat tree into my bedroom to give her a safe space for climbing, and I’m going to engage in play one on one with Graybie daily. I’m also starting them both on meds.
The vet is also making contacts with the folks at Auburn Vet School to find out if there is a Cat Behaviorist in the area.
In the meantime, if you have any suggestions about things I can do to address Little Girl’s fearful behavior and Graybie’s aggressive behavior, I am open to anything.
Dogpaddling Through Life 
Are there videos on YouTube or on line that might be of help with positive reinforcement play is all I can think of in addition to what you’re doing. Good luck with this.
Thanks! And I’ll have a look.
Poor Little Girl; I feel so sorry. I hope you find a solution soon. They look like my two black kitties, Izzy and Lizzy; so pretty.
They are. I don’t know what started it all but I have inadvertently reinforced this bad behavior. Now the hard work to reverse the patterns.
Yeah, we went through that when Lizzy got a steroid shot for a hip inflammation. She became mean after that. You probably don’t want to hear this, but the only thing that seemed to help was time.
I have had to separate cats during my lifetime…at least once? now, I am working on my idiotic human “marriage” and have decided to run away with Russell Crowe who named his favorite horse “Honey” and whom I adore and understand. because I too want to throw a phone. Divorce is an option for humans, but after 50 years of “marriage” I am trapped in hell! plus, I no longer believe in veterinarians? help? at the end of my rope! god bless, little girl. maybe she needs her own space like I do? I love your writings! and I am pretty sure “James Mason” from “Bigger than Life” movie is the other human in my household…see the film.
It’s never too late to create a better life for yourself. You deserve it.
^^this^^
Love you ❤️
I don’t have any suggestions. You are doing everything I know. Maybe they will put Graybie on a sort of tranquilizer. Hugs.
Have you tried Hemp CBD oil? It often assists with anxiety in dogs and cats (and people). It really helped my Silky terrier with his anxiety. It has no THC and can be legally purchased on the internet. CBDAmericalShaman.com even has a fish flavor for cats; I used beef and cheese flavor for my dogs.
I can only offer” purrayers” that things will get better for you kitties. Giving Little Girl her own safe space as much as you can is probably the best thing you can do at this point.
Thanks. I just tried the first dose of medication and neither cat would eat the food it’s in. *sigh*
I hope you get many comments with good tips and tricks… and maybe one will solve the problem… hugs to you we hope for good news from the cat-front ;O)
Damn cats I tell you! When I bought Mika home almost 2 weeks ago she pee’s and poo’ed on the couch! She kept stalking me and making strange noises u til I realised she was waiting for me to get off the couch so she could ‘use’ it! I just had to wait her out. She gave up and used the tray. Damn cats! It’s all I have. Cheers,H
Oh dear! Sounds like the fearful behavior there too. Hope things are calming down.
I’m more into dogs than cats, so wish you luck. Is it jealousy perhaps? Who came first into the household, Graybie or Little Girl?
Technically Graybie did, but that was 9 years ago. Compounding matters is the fact I bottle-fed Graybie while Little Girl was born to and cared for by her feral mama.
Hopefully other readers will come up with some pointers.
I think there’s serious instinct at work. It seems very harsh, but I think you’re facing DNA at work.
MasterB is aggressor by the neighbourhood cats. I I take him out under armed guard, and squirt the super soaker at any cat who comes within fifteen feet of him they tend to move off, while he seems to think they are leaving him alone without any intervention from me. He then behaves more confidently, and has been known to sit companionably with one of them. I suppose I am trying to modify the behaviour of both sides.
Does Graybie like Catnip? If you get really good strong catnip he may get blissed out by it and ignoreLittle Girl.
I have a plant growing so I’ll give it a try. Thanks!
We’re so sorry. Is it possible to separate them for a while, Jen? Sometimes, these situations require a “reset”/reintroduction, even if the kitties have been around each other their whole lives. In any case, we sure hope you all can figure this out.
I am not sure what type of aggressive behavior that Graybie is exhibiting, but I will share my story. We adopted sisters. We were told they were bonded. But I had my doubts. It seemed to me that if I gave Teagan attention, then the little one, Nessa, would attack her. The “attacks” didn’t seem particular vicious . . . in fact I always have a hard time knowing if they are playing or fighting, but it seemed like Teagan was afraid. And she wouldn’t let me pet her if Nessa was in the room. So we would sneak off when Nessa was sleeping or not paying attention and I would give her attention. A woman told me to ALWAYS greet Nessa first. Which, to me, was unfair because it was Teagan that would come to greet me, but I didn’t care for Nessa “beating up” her sister. So . . . I did that. I ALWAYS greeted Nessa first. So I did that for a long time. I also tried to pay more attention to her . . . . but I would make sure to sneak off and give Teagan a lot of love an attention too. I somewhat think that Teagan was more timid and fearful and so her sister took advantage of that. The greeting order and attention giving seemed to have worked. Teagan did become a little more confident (happened when we changed her name from Smokey to Teagan – coincidence? I am not sure.*) Every once in a while I see Nessa swatting at her sister or chasing her, BUT, I also see Teagan doing that too. I am not sure if cats just have to work it out for themselves.
I wonder if you changed Little Girl’s names to Xena Warrior Cat or something confident and strong, if she would be more confident and get picked on less?
*Smokey is an everyday cat kind of name. Teagan means beautiful and her personality changed at the exact same time we changed their names. We had had them a year and I couldn’t think of any names I liked and that suited them. But then I found Teagan and Nessa (FKA Esmeralda).
Good luck. It is so awful to have someone you love beat up on someone you love!