The Way Things Are Sucks

My dear friends, I am exhausted.

The vet put Molly on an additional medication – gabapentin – and for a few days she was a different dog. She was interactive and energetic. But it didn’t last. At least her pain is lessened,

Kitten had her spay surgery yesterday. Once home she was clawing at the crate to get out and I was afraid she’d harm herself so I let her out. That was a mistake. She did harm herself and last night I made a mad dash to the emergency vet clinic a half hour away. Kitten underwent another surgery to repair the damage and was doing well afterward. Once I heard the news I crashed.

Normal living is hard, but trying to do it all when you’re healing from extensive trauma is nearly impossible.

But there is hope. Recently I started finding dimes. Irony? No. Each dime came after I asked the Universe for help. I don’t suddenly believe in deities, but I do believe in String Theory and I believe in you. I found one yesterday and the small act sustained me enough to get through that awful time.

But it’s not enough. So I brazenly come to you asking for your help. Please do your thing, whatever works for you, and send me some positive people in my life. I need friends. I need physical presence. I need hugs, smiles, someone to sit with me when I’m too tired to do anything else. You are good and loving souls and I know you can make it happen. So give those folks a little opposing force and push them toward me. And thank you.

Please note I am not asking for advice on how I can find friends. I have no energy, otherwise why would I be asking for unproven help of people I’ve never met. Save your well-intentioned but poorly-timed advice for another time and place.

Oh, and if you think now would be a good time to take advantage of me when I’m down, I suggest you rethink that. I’m hurting and I’m tired but I’m also madder than hell and if the situation required it would stab you in the heart without flinching.

Please hold up Kitten and Molly with your love.

41 thoughts on “The Way Things Are Sucks

      1. Understand. The decisions are not easy. Been there way too many times. I hope somehow it gives you comfort that you’re an incredible woman with a huge giving heart–the best fur mommy ever. Try to let that seep into your brain chemistry. A lot of us out here respect and love you.

  1. Jen, I completely relate to the exhaustion. I wonder what’s happened to the strong, energetic person I used to be before death. The other day I had something scary happen, I just didn’t know what to do. A couple hours later in Lowe’s, a man out of the blue approached and focused on my questions, and when done said: it’s hard asking for help, it’s hard for me too. Wow! I was stunned. Hugs this moment, I’d run over and sit with you and listen. I’m listening for your cries in the wind …

  2. we send lots of hugs your way and hope that all things land at the right place like da dime in da music box.. … I feel with you, is it the time or is it me but currently things suck like they are… yes!

  3. Sending you hugs, Jen. I know how hard it can be seeing animals in pain. Sometimes I wish we could rewind or fast forward life…

  4. Love and soft purring from RainbowCatsx14 (plus Pippa and her six kittens temporarily…everyone now has a home to go to!). And hugs and love from me.

  5. Dear Jen, I’ve just rediscovered your blog and was sorry to learn you are having such a rough time with your fur kids. Sending much love and hugs. It’s never easy! ❤

  6. Holding up Molly & Kitten with all our ❤ ❤ here Jen! I will ask the Universe to send you the people you want & need. I find htere is such a HUGE disconnect between everyone…..Partly due to Covid & partly due to the way society is.
    I am struggling with so many health issues & I'm all alone. The family have walked away. My closest friends have serious crappola in their lives to deal with…..so I am SOLO.
    I will not say anything like a platitude….I will say I am here for you & you can always email me for a chat!!!
    {{{hugs}}} Sherri-Ellen (BellaSita) & ***purrss*** BellaDharma

  7. Wow ! I can send purrayers and Power of the Paw to your animals. I pretty much have my cats to bond with, so I am not much help.

  8. I am sending you positive vibes. I feel slightly defeated to. Whenever I feel like there is no gray cloud hanging above me, bam! I get one lightning strike. But, my way of dealing? Trying to find the positive side to all the BS that goes on around me. Faith and Karma….right?

  9. Trauma healing for humans may be a real challenge. Especially repeat trauma. We encounter much of it every day, often these people have to soldier on without medical help or counseling.

      1. I can understand that. I have also seen decades of the most acute human suffering, most who just had to make do without any help. I am trying to bring perspective. Twenty years ago, due to malnutrition, I had to open several boils the hard way.

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