Little Girl has decided she no longer wants to go downstairs to eat. For the life of me I don’t know why. Instead she stands at the top of the stairs and meows pitifully. She won’t come downstairs no matter how much I beg, and she won’t let me pick her up and take her […]
This morning I woke the same way I have for the past few days: clutching one of Rumpy’s old stuffed toys. October is Rumpy’s Gotcha month. He’s been gone for 6 months, but the hurt is as acute as the day he died. In some ways things have improved. Now that I no longer care […]
Bubba is home. He had stopped eating and was back to hiding in the bathroom closet sleeping all day. He was in a lot of pain. My sweet boy. I have taken his death particularly hard. Or maybe it’s the grieving the loss of four companions within the past 16 months. I feel incredibly guilty, and […]
My little ranter has died. Two weeks ago we were at the vet because he wasn’t eating. They drew blood from his jugular and felt nothing unusual in his neck. The blood work looked good. Last week we were back because he was worse. The tumor had grown rapidly, because now it could be felt. […]
Dear Rumpy, It’s hard to believe it ‘s been one month since you died. I am still not used to waking and not having to immediately go outside, or not needing to hurry home so you can pee. I don’t spend much time outside in the yard anymore. Last week I mowed the yard and saw the […]
I woke up Wednesday morning at 3 am and began the countdown. Seven hours left, then six, then three, then one… Each hour I committed to be present for Rumpy. No nose stuck in a laptop or phone. No busy work. I talked to him. I reminded him of the day we met. How after it […]
Dear friends, I have fought the good fight, but I told Jen I am tired and ready to go. I am sad to say good-bye to Jen and to the kitties- even June Buggie. And I am sad to say good-bye to you. But my body is tired, and no amount of sleep or cookies makes me […]
I am now assigned to work from home. It’s great to get to be here with Rumpy and the kitties more, even if I’m working. Especially now. Rumpy has taken a turn for the worse. He still eats well and never says no when I offer to take him outside, but his breathing continues to […]
I have been upfront and open about Rumpy’s condition: he has a tumor at the base of his heart that has grown. He has a lypoma beneath the muscle on a hind leg that is not worth removing because he also has difficulty breathing due to laryngeal paralysis. It was most likely the lar-par that led […]
I’ve been hesitant to write. Not because I don’t know what to say, but because my dog is dying and I don’t want to talk about that publicly too much. I know you’re animal lovers and that you understand. But stoicism is the message we’ve been given all our lives; you don’t grieve animals. You bury them and move on. And […]
Dogpaddling Through Life 